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Making an emergency plan for your pets

Posted by TerranceV | Home | Posted on September 18th, 2011

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If you die what happens to your pet?

Posted by TerranceV | Home | Posted on September 5th, 2011

© Copyright 2010 Mother Nature Network

Originally Published On: www.cnn.com – Original Article Here

16 repeated job search errors

Posted by TerranceV | Home | Posted on September 3rd, 2011

(CareerBuilder.com) — Over the years, hiring managers have born witness to every hiring, interviewing, résumé, cover letter and negotiation mistake there is.

You know what these blunders are. Yet you (and hundreds of other job seekers) continue to make common job search mistakes.

Job searching the Generation Y way

From those who see your mistakes over and over, here are 16 common job search mistakes to avoid — and some of them may surprise you.

1. You don’t keep your options open

"Candidates tend to think that if they interview for a job they will get an offer, so they do not apply and interview for multiple positions," says Joanie Spain, director of public relations and career services, School of Advertising Art, a graphic design college. "They wait until one plays out completely, putting their job search on hold until knowing for sure they didn’t get the offer."

"By having many more irons in the fire, you diversify the risk and disappointment that is inevitable when any single opportunity disappears," adds Roy Cohen, author of "The Wall Street Professional’s Survival Guide: Success Secrets of a Career Coach."

"You also present yourself as a more passionate and energetic candidate. You’re in the ‘zone’ — a point where you’re in the flow of information and ideas — and that makes you more valuable."

2. You turn up your nose at job descriptions

"Entry-level candidates are reluctant to apply for a position unless the job sounds like their ‘dream job’ or they have all qualifications listed," Spain says.

"Rather than going on an interview to get more information, they base decisions about applying on the job description alone. They fail to see that all interview experience is good experience, or that, until there is an offer on the table, there is no decision to make."

3. You haven’t perfected the thank-you note

"Don’t be too verbose with a thank-you note after an interview. Sending out a version of "War and Peace" can come across as desperate and needy for a job. However, sending a one or two sentence thank-you note comes across as flippant, not well thought-out and potentially shows indifference regarding the job to the employer," says Mike Barefoot, senior account manager at Red Zone Resources, a recruitment firm.

"We encourage candidates to keep them to four to eight sentences."

4. You don’t check your references

"Always give out references that you’ve pre-screened. We sometimes see candidates give out references that were never checked with and the references feedback isn’t always kind," Barefoot says.

"Also, make sure they’re predominantly managers. An occasional colleague is okay, but contemporaries and friends really don’t carry that much weight in helping you land a position."

5. You’ve got poor business acumen

"Managers are becoming more savvy and are taking candidates out to lunch for interviews. They want to see how you treat a restaurant staff and see the ‘real’ you. If you’re rude to them or don’t seem appreciative for their hard work to make your meal pleasurable, managers wonder how you’ll treat contemporaries you work with," Barefoot says.

6. You have a messy briefcase

"A messy briefcase can imply the person is unorganized, messy and unprepared, and that their work will be less than optimal," says Ronald Kaufman, author of "Anatomy of Success."

"Someone who is neat, clean, organized and prepared in all areas conveys they’re serious about getting a job and working."

7. You discount temporary positions

"Many employers coming out of a recession want to hire on a temporary or temp- to perm- basis. We have already seen several contractors be offered permanent positions after they have proven themselves," says Jeffrey Weinstock, Esq. president, Rhodes & Weinstock, a recruiting firm.

"Not only will the temporary position pay some bills, think of it as an audition for a potential perm position, or at least a way to get a good reference for another position."

8. You have a bad attitude

"Poor attitudes come through in telephone calls and in interviews. If you are not positive, why would a potential employer want to hire you?" asks Weinstock. "It may take some time, but by being positive, by doing all the right things, by seeing each position as an opportunity, it will happen."

9. You include too much work history

"Many job seekers over 40 think that they have to take their work history back to their first job out of college," says Cheryl E. Palmer, career coach and résumé writer. " All that is needed is the last 10-15 years of your work history."

10. You use your work email address on your résumé

"Some people do not regularly check their personal email, so they use their employers’ email instead," Palmer says. "This sends a negative message to potential employers that the job seekers will not hesitate to use their equipment for personal use."

11. You take "no" as a final answer

"No" usually only means "no" for that position, says Bruce Hurwitz, president and CEO, Hurwitz Strategic Staffing, LTD.

"If you are rejected for a job you should send a thank-you note, thank the employer for the opportunity, and wish them well. No one does that. When the next opening comes around, he’ll remember you," says Hurwitz.

12. You lack tact

"Be determined without being pushy. Calling or emailing to ask about the status of your résumé or interview can be a double-edged sword," says Rod Hughes, director of communications, Oxford Communications.

"A tactful follow up can place you top of mind with the hiring manager, while incessant calling or emailing can push your résumé right off the table."

13. You don’t search for yourself on the Internet

"Your would-be employer is probably going to look you up online, so you should know what is out there," says Amanda O’Brien, vice president of marketing, Hall Web Services.

"Clean up what you can, check your privacy settings on social networks and if it is something you can’t get down off the internet, you may want to consider talking to the company about it."

14. You have a ‘death by bullets’ résumé

"Bullets are great but they need context. Keep them to one line, focused on a result and include a figure like a fact, percentage or number," says Adriana Llames, author of "Career Sudoku: 9 Ways to Win the Job Search Game." "Or, put the information in a short summary of the position."

15. You’ve got a scattered strategy

"Looking for a job in any industry and with two or three résumés is going to get the same result as the strategy: scattered," Llames says. "Job seekers with a clearly defined, focused and organized strategic approach to their job search end up with clear results — and a new job."

16. You think it’s about you

It is not about you and your need for a job — it is about the prospective employer and their need to run a successful business and make money, says Lori B. Rassas, employment attorney and author of "Employment Law: A Guide to Hiring, Managing and Firing for Employers and Employees."

"Many applicants mistakenly believe they will be an appealing candidate if they explain they will accept any type of job offer at any salary because they have been laid off, unemployed for an extended period of time, have children in college, or are having difficulty making the mortgage payments," she says.

"Even if all of those circumstances are true, candidates need to craft a different message, focusing on how they can benefit the employer by saving them money, streamlining processes, creating additional sources of revenue and bringing overall value to the company."

&copy CareerBuilder.com 2010. All rights reserved. The information contained in this article may not be published, broadcast or otherwise distributed without the prior written authority.

Originally Published On: www.cnn.com – Original Article Here

Funny ways to stop marriage fights

Posted by TerranceV | Home | Posted on September 3rd, 2011

(OPRAH.com) — You’re mulling the night’s TV options when your significant other grabs the remote and starts clicking away like a sugar-fueled 5-year-old. When you mention this, he asks how your OCD is going.

You counterstrike that his mother raised her sons to be boorish louts — eliciting his usual rant about your mom still serving him meatloaf when he’s been a vegetarian for years.

Oprah.com: What’s your love trap?

It’s the same fight you had last week. And the 962 weeks previous. It would almost be funny if the whole routine weren’t so hurtful, unproductive, and bafflingly inescapable.

But here’s the aha: While repetitive arguments stem from misunderstandings and emotional wounds, they also owe a lot to simple pattern formation. As my karate teacher used to say, practice doesn’t make perfect — it makes permanent. What we’ve done before, we tend to do again.

Oprah.com: Step-by-step guide to getting relationship right

Which means we can disrupt our patterns with a brilliant trick that marriage therapist Bill O’Hanlon calls the do-one-thing-different approach.

For instance, you can criticize each other’s TV habits, but only if you’re wearing oven mitts. You can insult relatives as long as you’re lying on the floor. You can question each other’s sanity, but only in whispers.

Oprah.com: Seduction instructions even a klutz can follow

The effect can be extraordinary. Your brain, startled by new associations, loses the familiar flow as you see the useless toxicity of whatever you’re about to say. You may even end up laughing.

At the least, you’ll find you have the power to change fights you "can’t help" having, by starting small and being creative. And that’s a pattern you want to repeat.

Originally Published On: www.cnn.com – Original Article Here

How to be a good friend

Posted by TerranceV | Home | Posted on September 3rd, 2011

(RealSimple.com) — Bert and Ernie. Laverne and Shirley. Thelma and Louise. These duos knew what it took to create a lasting bond.

Here, expert suggestions for creating your own enduring relationships (none of which involve driving off a cliff).

Stop giving advice

If you always tell your friend how to fix her problems, the relationship will be unbalanced. You become the One Who Knows All, and she becomes the One Who Is Troubled. Eventually you’re both going to tire of those roles.

Instead, let her bounce ideas off of you. Ask, "What are you planning to do about this tricky situation?" Or just give a supportive comment: "That sounds difficult. How do you feel about it?"

Offer your opinion only if she asks for it. Otherwise you’re not having a dialogue; you’re giving a lecture.
–Frank M. Lachmannm Ph.D., is a New York City-based psychologist and the author of "Transforming Narcissism."

Show a different side of yourself

One great way to do that is to mix friends from different areas of your life — say, throw a get-together with your college buddies and your pals from work. You’ll find yourself opening up more, and your friends will learn new things about you. Friendships benefit from a breath of fresh air.
–Sally Horchow is a coauthor of "The Art of Friendship: 70 Simple Rules for Making Meaningful Connections."

RealSimple.com: 5 inspirational friendships

Be (genuinely) happy for your friend’s success

Friends want you to celebrate with them when good things happen. Sometimes that’s harder than it sounds, especially if you’re a little jealous of your pal’s success.

Swallow that emotion, because she doesn’t just need a shoulder to cry on in a crisis. She’s also looking for someone to cheer her triumphs. Joy shared is joy doubled.
–Jennifer Litchman is one of the 10 lifelong friends who were the subject of Jeffrey Zaslow’s best-selling book "The Girls From Ames."

RealSimple.com: When friendships go wrong

Make small gestures

You don’t have to go to great lengths — throwing a surprise party or giving an expensive gift — to show your friends you love them.

Case in point: When I had surgery in 2009, about 50 people posted short comments online wishing me well. I was touched. If you don’t use social media, reach out in other ways. Leave your friend a compassionate voice message, or stop by her office with a latte if she’s had a tough day. It will mean the world.
–Jason Falls is a social-media consultant based in Louisville, Kentucky.

RealSimple.com: Famous friendship quotes

Originally Published On: www.cnn.com – Original Article Here

Caution! Homework ahead

Posted by TerranceV | Home | Posted on September 2nd, 2011

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Copyright 2010 The Parenting Group. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is prohibited.

Originally Published On: www.cnn.com – Original Article Here

Parents seeking compatible couples

Posted by TerranceV | Home | Posted on September 2nd, 2011

Try a FREE TRIAL issue of Parenting Magazine – CLICK HERE!

Copyright 2010 The Parenting Group. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is prohibited.

Originally Published On: www.cnn.com – Original Article Here

Uncomfortable job interviews

Posted by TerranceV | Home | Posted on September 2nd, 2011

&copy CareerBuilder.com 2010. All rights reserved. The information contained in this article may not be published, broadcast or otherwise distributed without the prior written authority.

Originally Published On: www.cnn.com – Original Article Here

Don Lemon’s marriage dilemma

Posted by TerranceV | Home | Posted on September 2nd, 2011

Editor’s note: Don Lemon anchors “CNN Newsroom” on weekends during prime time and is a correspondent for the network. He will guest host “The Joy Behar Show” on HLN each night this week at 10 ET. He’s also the author of a memoir called “Transparent.” You can follow him on Twitter, @donlemoncnn.

(CNN) — Ah, the confirmed bachelor.

Think George Clooney, Gerard Butler or even old Hollywood’s Clark Gable. We anticipate whom they’ll turn up with on the red carpet at the next Hollywood premiere or which starlet will be photographed hanging from their arm as they slip out of the hottest, newest restaurant or nightclub.

Though it wasn’t celebrated by larger society, it used to be that gay men once enjoyed that same freedom to play the field. But thanks to our freedom-fighting brethren, not anymore.

Don’t get me wrong; it’s not that I long for the good old days when gay men and women had to hide and lie about themselves and their partners by calling them “friend” or “roommate.” Not at all! But as same-sex marriage is becoming legalized in places like New York and beyond, many of us suddenly have to face the reality and the question that many of our straight friends have always faced: “When are you going to settle down and get married?”

More and more these days, I hear gay couples lamenting over it in restaurants, at work and at dinner parties. My friends call me with their own similar accounts.

Lucky for them, they don’t get called on the carpet over it in public. But I did, literally on a red carpet. And it lives in print and on the Internet for all to see. It was my first red carpet experience earlier this summer after coming out publicly in my book “Transparent.”

It didn’t go well when a New York Magazine reporter inquired about my own marriage intentions.

Here’s the exchange:

So there we were, chatting with newly out CNN anchor Don Lemon at Monday’s Trevor Live event, and just like annoying Aunt Sadie, we asked if he and his partner of four years are planning on tying the knot. After a long, awkward pause, Lemon laughed and said, “Listen, I am not planning on getting married. I’m not planning on not getting married.” Another pause. “You mean, you’re asking me if I’m planning on getting married in the near future?”

Yes, that’s what we’re asking, we pressed. “Since I was a kid I’ve always wanted to get married. And I think that now that, you know, there is a possibility for me to get married, I think that, yeah, one day I would like to get married, and maybe soon,” Lemon said. “I have no immediate plans, but I say why not? I am in a very happy, very solid relationship, so sure, one day I’d like to get married, and I might do it.”

Obviously Lemon was not comfortable talking about this, but just like Aunt Sadie never takes the hint, we blustered on with questions about this hypothetical wedding. When our conversation ended and Lemon was walking away, we overheard him say to his rep, “Did I dance around that enough?”

I warned you it didn’t go well.

I wasn’t ready for that question from a persistent reporter. Nor am I ready for it from family members, friends, neighbors or random people who approach me in public.

Honestly, I hadn’t pondered marriage since I came to terms with my sexuality almost two decades ago.

But it really hit home for me when to my and my boyfriend’s surprise The New York Observer named me a 2011 media power bachelor and I got the news in an e-mail that my colleague Joy Behar had tied the knot with her long-time boyfriend, Steve Janowitz. While the power bachelor thing was fun, the Joy thing got me thinking. I haven’t had the opportunity to ask her directly why she decided to get married after 29 years of unwedded bliss.

Maybe it had something to do with her new grandson and her public support of gay marriage. Perhaps New York’s new marriage law had greased the skids for Ms. Behar-Janowitz. Whatever her reasons, Joy’s last tweet before running off with Steve was a sign for me. It simply reads, “gone fishing.”

So just as I did when I came out publicly this summer, I’ll get ahead of all those “fishing” for an answer about my marriage plans. While I respect the gay couples who have or are planning on tying the knot soon, the truth is, just like straight people, not all gay people want to or should get married.

But perhaps the best answer and the one closest to my own comes from a personal quote on the website IMDB from another confirmed bachelor, Leonardo DiCaprio.

“People always like to make up stories. I am not planning on getting married. Then again, I might wake up tomorrow and decide to get married!”

Thanks Leo.

Originally Published On: www.cnn.com – Original Article Here

9 ways to rebound after losing a job

Posted by TerranceV | Home | Posted on September 2nd, 2011

(CareerBuilder.com) — Rebuilding your confidence after a job loss can be difficult. It’s easy to fall into the trap of feeling sorry for yourself, which can cause you to doubt your ability to land a new position. If that happens, make bouncing back your top priority.

Here are nine ways to regain confidence after a job loss:

1. Develop a routine

Not having control of your job search can have a negative effect on your self-esteem. Instead of wallowing, treat the job search process like a full-time job and be thorough and deliberate in your search.

"Develop a routine each day to regain control," says Jayne Mattson, senior vice president of Keystone Associates, a New England-based career management firm. "There are so many activities of a search that will keep you busy and that you have control over, so use your time wisely."

2. Find a supportive network

Being surrounded by supportive circle can help rebuild your confidence, Mattson says. "The people who believe in you really do want you to find the right fit and they will be your best advocates to others," she says. Anyone from former colleagues or acquaintances to family members can help boost your self-esteem after a layoff.

3. Help others

Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, use your new free time to help others. Establishing new connections and applying your skills to other areas like volunteering or taking on leadership positions in your community can help you to bounce back, Mattson says.

"It will keep your skills sharp, make you feel better, but will also give you something to talk about when meeting others," she says.

4. Use positive affirmation

While getting support from others is key, it’s also important that you believe in your own skills. Use each day to verbalize a positive affirmation and remind yourself that you possess valuable skills, Mattson says. "Self-talk becomes an important part of rebuilding self confidence," she says.

5. Take time to do something you love

"Filling part of every day with something you love to do will keep your engines going longer," Mattson says. It can be as simple as reading a book or listening to your favorite song, but make sure it’s a part of your day that you can look forward to.

6. Exercise

Exercise is a natural endorphin booster, so you’re bound to be in a much better mood post-workout. If paying for a gym membership is prohibitive, keep costs low by jogging outdoors and doing an at-home yoga routine. Since you’re no longer tied to your desk for hours each day, use the new flexibility to get back into shape and feel better about yourself.

7. Allow time to heal

Especially in a tough economy — when job interviews are harder to come by — it can take time to regain confidence and no one expects you to recover right away.

"Don’t beat yourself up," Mattson says. "Recognize that you will have good and bad days." Going through a job loss is never easy, and there’s nothing wrong with allowing some time to heal.

8. Meet other job seekers

Knowing that you’re not alone can go a long way in helping boost your mood. Seek out networking events in your industry or attend job search lectures to get out and mingle with other job seekers. With less interaction in your day-to-day life, meeting others can play a big part in boosting morale.

9. Be ready for a tough road ahead

Being prepared for the less-than transparent interview process can go a long way in protecting you from further disappointments and plunges in confidence. With high unemployment rates, being out of work has become standard for many professionals and isn’t a reflection on your abilities.

&copy CareerBuilder.com 2010. All rights reserved. The information contained in this article may not be published, broadcast or otherwise distributed without the prior written authority.

Originally Published On: www.cnn.com – Original Article Here